First off, let me start by saying that I have not been diagnosed with cancer today. Two days ago, I received a voicemail at home from the cancer agency. For almost one month, I’d kind of forgotten that I was even waiting for another biopsy date. Life has been so wonderful lately, that I had very little time to think about anything other than all of the good stuff. When I listened to the message, it indicated that I do in fact have an appointment booked with the radiology department for my next biopsy. May 10th.
As you all know, my last biopsy in March proved to be clear and negative of any cancer on the right side of my neck. This time around, I will be having a lymph node on the left side of my neck biopsied.
Not sure if it was my menstrual cycle hormones, or the news of my appointment, but that day took a turn for downward emotions. I was on edge. I was pretty irritable. And most definitely, I was letting that voice message determine how I got through my day. It was like a black cloud loomed over me.
Until suddenly, after a good cry and some fresh air with the kids at our townhouse complex playground. Not to mention realizing I did infact have my period. I realized that I had to dig deep and get over myself. I wassn’t diagnosed with cancer again. This is a routine appointment for me to determine if there is anything to worry about. So for now, the best thing I could do for myself is to keep moving forward with a positive outlook and a clear concious mind. I know that thinking and feeling sorry for myself won’t help me or my family. Instead of letting negativity drown me, I need to keep my head up.
Cancer did not define me 10 years ago, 8 years ago, or even 3 years ago. And I certainly will not let the idea of cancer define me today. I am feeling the best I have ever felt in 10 years and come hell or high water, this biopsy will not change that.